.:. I'm WHO I'm .:.

This may a lil outdated announcement..

Just to say that..I'm no longer the employee of The Hunter Group.

Currently still unemployed.. but, aiming for an interview which need to wait a few more months..and I'm working out on something too now..
If i ever succeed, then only I shall announce again.. If not, I will just find a permanent job start next year~

Thanks ^^

Hey hey..

I'm currently working as a Recruitment Consultant with The Hunter Group Recruitment Agency.

I've created another blog of mine to post up job opportunities/vacancies. Please do visit http://www.employers-and-employees.blogspot.com from time to time to get the latest job updates available.

Will do some updates via Facebook too. Join our Page at Facebook as well at

http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Hunter-Group-Recruitment-Agency/134511903255912

Do spread the words to your other friends who need our services. Also for those employers who have any open positions in their company to fill up. May contact the hunter group or me for more details on the terms and conditions.

Drop us your resume as well too ^^

Thank you and have a nice day~

Time flies.. really flies..

One and a half months of holidays just gone like that..
But yeah, I did enjoy myself where I reward myself a relaxing and lazying holidays.. lol.. but I did earned some $$ too ya ^^


Now, I'm a 3rd Year university student.. graduating soon in about 7 months time..

Come to think about it.. I do have a lil fear.. fear of where will I be going after I grad? What will I be then? What types of challenges will I face?? Will everything well arranged for me?? hahaha.. I wish~ lol..

Well, I do have a mission actually... but the devils inside me are much stronger than me.. sigh~
Now I really really want it..!!! But scared of the disappointment I might get if I fail... but hey~ I haven't even try yet.. how to fail right???

I'll just try my very best! And also hope to have FULL supports from friends and family of cos~


Till end of the year or next year.. I'm not sure.. I will also be working part time 3 days a week.. I will take this as challenge too~ I hope that the more busy I become, the more hardworking I will be too.. haha.. Say NO to Procrastination!! ;)


As usual~ I always wanted to have good results in every semester.. But, I always disappoint myself.. but this time, again~ I will try my best! Just two subjects.. Double A for this!!! LOL~ *don't blow too loud* haha..


To All my Utar kawan kawan~ Let's enjoy to the max in our last year together~ After this, we will go on our own path, different paths~ and will not be able to meet everyday like now..


Wishing you girls all the best.. study hard and together aim for the BEST! :)

Hey people..

Miss me ma???? hahahaha...

It's been about 3 months since my last update.. which was a very sad post.. hehe..

What do you think about this new blogskin?? Still something similar to my previous one ya?

Special thanks to Jazlyn Ooi Khai Fang aka Ah Po!!! For helping me to change and edit the whole thing!!! hahaha.. if not I would not come back too..

Been too lazy and doesn't know where to start?? sigh~


:)


Well, I'm currently on my semester break.. can consider a long break too, after my Internship. Now left about 3 more weeks before Year 3 Semester 2 starts. WOW... Y3S2 edy???? So freaking fast wei...!!! Going to grad soon?? My God @@ I don't want to.. hahahah :P

What I've done for the past 4-5 weeks of holidays?? LOL...

Lepak and exercise in the Malls.. hahahaha.. watching a drama on Youtube - The Little Nyonya, Facebooking of course - current active games is Treasure Mania.. haha.. Go out for Soka Gakkai meetings.. due to H1N1, many meets have been slow down and even the cultural group practice has been canceled until further notice~ I wanna dance~~~!! sigh... Cleaned my room, I think only 60% are done.. haha.. I had a new DIY notice board :)

Supposed to go for a job interview as a part time customer service.. but but.. it's still pending~

But I got a job with A&L for 3 days exhibition next month and 1 more function on this week.

And.. supposed to do my FYP!! muahahhaha... but.. but again.. sigh.. LAZY is the key word here! Help larrrr~!!!! Scared yet not doing anything! :(


Since I'm quite 'free' now, I really want to take this opportunity to keep back in touch with some friends... long lost friends.. hehe :) And of course.. to have a good rest~ I don't mind just staying at home whole day for few days doing nothing.. hahahah :P How many times in our live we got such a break??? Not anymore when you start to work~ right?? :)

Dearest 3100~

You are my very first handphone that been with me for almost 6 years.. I bought u home with me with my hard earned salary...haha.. but now, I had to say goodbye to u.. I've no idea where that idiot will dump u but.. may u rest in peace~ You're the Strongest handphone I ever met~

I miss you~



Dearest Papupi~

You were given to me by my friend Miss Pee for my *i forgot which* birthday present.
I really liked you so much.. black and green.. what a cool combinations of colours.. and the logo there is so so cute~.. but now.. I've nothing else to replace you.. I will remember u always and I'm sorry that I had to let you go at such a young age..

I miss you~




Dearest 3 Flowers Bag~

Among hundreds and thousands bags available at the clearance stock fair.. I've picked you~ You looked so beautiful to me and I've chosen to bring you home with me with 70% offer.. haha.. I guess I could not celebrate our 1st year anniversary together cos ur gone now.. We tried looking for you in rubbish bins and on the floor but I know its hopeless.. I was only carrying 0.001% of hope with me that time.. I'm sorry... I shouldn't have brought u there and left you alone.. I was just too naive.. But I've got some in exchanged with you loss.. is the LESSON that I've learned~

I miss you~



Dearest Greenie Specs

Without you, I will recognise the wrong person, Without you, I could not watch the TV clearly, Without you, I could not see the road properly, Without you, i have to sit about 30cm apart from the monitor, Without you, I will be suffering.. like now~ We've been together for about 3 years perhaps.. I rmbr this specs was similar with my husband's green specs.. lol.. It's time to let u go now as the doctor had advised me before that you're old.. Its time for me to get a new one.. BUT for sure I will not forget your service to me~

I miss you~



Dearest All~

I'm really sorry that I bought u all there but never get to bring you back home with me..

Its because of my STUPIDITY that causes all these to happen..


Yea~ I've learned my Lesson.. will never repeat this anymore, I swear~





I'm still grieving~

hahhahaa...


I'm joining this....




Malaysian Environmental NGO - Mengo Green Hunt 2009


Of cos its not individual la.. play in a team of 4~ consist of Goh Jia Hui, Lai Kar Men, Ooi Khai Fang and I.. hahahha... girls power wei~~!! :)

paid registration fees which is kinda expensive for a game like this.. but the prize will be worth more than 20K... (if we win la) hahaahha :P


Will be Treasure Hunting in Klang Valley for half a day.. wow~ haha.. do I still have de stamina to run and walk?? I doubt it.. haha.. need to train from now on liao.. still got about 2 weeks from now on.. hey, jazlyn ah po.. come.. we gambate together la.. hahaha..

This thing reminds me of Scouts life last time.. haha.. during dunno what camp.. we sure have to hunt the whole PJ area.. even raining also we continue our journey.. quite memorable also la such experiences.. haha.. the tired-ness that we suffered.. lol..


Hope this will be a great one... haha.. kinda excited now also edy.. hahaha.. and of cos.. hope we can WIN yeah~~~ hahahahahhaa... ^^

Don't be fooled by me.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear
for I wear a mask. I wear a thousand masks-
masks that I'm afraid to take off
and none of them are me.
Pretending is an art that's second nature with me
But don't be fooled, for God's sake, don't be fooled.
I give you the impression that I'm secure
That all is sunny and unruffled with me
within as well as without,
that confidence is my name
and coolness my game,
that the water's calm
and I'm in command,
and that I need no one.
But don't believe me. Please!

My surface may be smooth but my surface is my mask,
My ever-varying and ever-concealing mask.
Beneath lies no smugness, no complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me in confusion, in fear, in aloneness.
But I hide this.
I don't want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weaknesses
and fear exposing them.
That's why I frantically create my masks to hide behind.
They're nonchalant, sophisticated facades to help me pretend,
To shield me from the glance that knows.
But such a glance is precisely my salvation,
my only salvation,
and I know it.

That is, if it's followed by acceptance,
and if it's followed by love.
It's the only thing that can liberate me from myself
from my own self-built prison walls.

I dislike hiding, honestly
I dislike the superficial game I'm playing,
the superficial phony game.
I'd really like to be genuine and me.
But I need your help, your hand to hold
Even though my masks would tell you otherwise
That glance from you is the only thing that assures me
of what I can't assure myself,
that I'm really worth something.

But I don't tell you this.
I don't dare.
I'm afraid to.
I'm afraid you'll think less of me, that you'll laugh
and your laugh would kill me.
I'm afraid that deep-down I'm nothing, that I'm just no good
and you will see this and reject me.

So I play my game, my desperate, pretending game
With a facade of assurance without
And a trembling child within.
So begins the parade of masks,
The glittering but empty parade of masks,
and my life becomes a front.
I idly chatter to you in suave tones of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's nothing
and nothing of what's everything,
of what's crying within me.
So when I'm going through my routine
do not be fooled by what I'm saying
Please listen carefully and try to hear
what I'm not saying
Hear what I'd like to say
but what I can not say.

It will not be easy for you,
long felt inadequacies make my defenses strong.
The nearer you approach me
the blinder I may strike back.
Despite what books say of men, I am irrational;
I fight against the very thing that I cry out for.
you wonder who I am
you shouldn't
for I am everyman
and everywoman
who wears a mask.

Don't be fooled by me.
At least not by the face I wear.

-----author unknown and it has been published in a number of books.

Finally...

After so long planning and making decisions whether to perm or rebond.. at last.. yesterday..

I went..

I've straightened my hair..!! haha.. at Kim Marie, SS2..

This is my 2nd time straightened only.. the 1st time was in year 2006.. haha.. so long edy..

Now, can't wash hair for 3 days, can't tie hair for 2 months.. and need to apply oil everyday..
sungguh memafankan.. lol

Spent alot for this one.. Its a package which included pre and post-treatment.. trim abit.. and the total : about more than half of the amount I paid 3 years ago.. lol..
Sat there for more than 4 hours~ read magazine.. read the book I bought earlier.. wah.. tak boleh tahan.. eyes keep closing.. hahaha.. so damn sleepy lor.. sigh.. from around 3pm++ sit until 7pm++..


And.. I saw Miss Pee Hui Han.. but dunno she didn't see me.. haha.. I wanted to call her but I can't move my head as they were 'steaming' my hair.. lol.. she was just sitting behind me only leh.. haha.. she didn't wear specs la so can't see me.. lol..



Wonder how long the straightness can last.. haha..

yes.. today is de last day of de hard core long semester.. with 6 heavy subjects.. and.. everything is over now.....

I know I've abandoned my blog for quite some time... when I don't feel like writing yet I've so much to talk and express.. I just can't type a single word.. dunno why~

really want to 'report' about de prom nite.. my studies in this 14 hectic weeks.. my final exams.. my activities in gakkai.. how i cope with so called stress and how I went thru my nites being a stalker.. lol.. my serious addiction towards facebook and on9ing.. angry moments.. happppppyyy moments, sad moments, lonely moments and.. lots more~~

now.. everything has become a history of mine.. and I shall just keep it as a memory.. hope it won't get deleted from my memory ram.. haha..

Seriously, when think if it.. time just pass so damn freaking fast.. *tick tick tick* and just went off.. it didn't want to wait for me..and it won't wait for anyone though~ haha.. sometimes, it was so scary that it went tooo fast.. I got scared~ :P

This semester, I've been very daring person.. almost all these subject I only start studying one day before.. In my next blog post when my results are out.. u will see lots of REGRET word there.. haha.. why??? why I like this and like that??? why??? hahahaa :P


and.. one more.. my sleeping pattern.. hmm....

I've been sleeping only for 3-4 hours everyday..

My new year resolution for year 2009 is to sleep early... hahhhaha.. maximum by 1am have to sleep edy.. but.. due to deadlines and last minutes works.. I always stayed up late.. then, when nothing to do.. I will spend it by playin games and chatting~ sigh~

My 'good fren' Mr Panda is becoming my very best fren now.. hahahhahah.. :P and I have to get rid of him.. cannot stay tooo close.. lol.. anyone get my joke? lol :)

I really need to adjust back properly and I need lots of motivation and determination in doing so.. please stop me and SCOLD me to turn off my com after 1am~ sigh~


***

Now, I have 2 weeks of holidays .. before I start my Internship.. guess what.. I no longer working at APE Ideas... but.. at Ti-Ratana.. its a social work based.. hmmm... totally 360 degree changed.. I've no idea why they could just change jus like that.. no notification untill de day we signed for our agreement n submitted the particular forms like that.. sigh~

So now, I dunno I should be happy or not of being placed here.. I think I should be more happy in here compared to APES.. cos.. I will have more frens together here.. though I only know 2 ppl out of about 7-8 ppl being placed there.. haha... good chance to get to know others better.. hehe.. I'm de only one from my class.. no more gila-gila with the girls for 4 months edy.. ahhahaha :P
Now, I need to travel even further.. its at Salak Selatan~ Next week I have to go explore edy.. sienz~


-

This 2 weeks won't be a holiday for me though.. after go for 2 trips.. come back edy then I have to do my FYP.. left ONE week to do.. one week to do 2 chapters.. my god~ I can ma?? I doubt it lor.. sigh.. and many other things i need to catch up.. especially my dance.. i seriously suck in this dance now.. been practicing the same all over again for few weeks i still cant master it properly.. sigh.. my memory and skills problems..

Okie.. now, I still have lots of things to update and 'report'.. but I need to sleep~ hahahah.. I need rest... after burning midnite oils for so many nites.. lol..

I NEED REST~ I need a good sleep and dreams~~~ hehe..

nitezz~

On Friday, was having CMT II presentation.. in a mock seminar style.. of course I wasn't the main speaker, but emcee.. so still gotto be very formal type..

During preparation, hand shaking..

During opening, mouth shaking..

Whole body shake shake.. hahah :P

This one, its kinda 'normal' la.. that's how I presented in front of class during all sorts of presentations right??

But still.. I still have the super anxious feelings.. sigh~


Feedback:

-> u very good in emcee-ing. (wahahhhaa.. so happy :D lol thank u wor)



*****



On Saturday night, during Dove Dance practice.. I'm in-charged of Study session..

supposed to present last month, but keep delaying as I not free or no transport and all..

so yesterday, finally its time for me to TALK!

was so nervous again~ during practice.. can't really concentrate too.. sigh.. keep worrying..

My topic is on Relationship.. I will share it here next round.. relationship, doesn't mean just de girl boy type of r/ship.. can be with family, friends or coworkers..

I've cited from a book.. its a whole chapter with about more than 10 pages.. but hv to summarize into just a 5-10 minutes talk..

during de Study session.. my audience.. I think got more than 30 people.. or 40++ I'm not too sure.. ranging from small kids to adults.. do you know how stressful was it? sigh~


Feedbacks:

-> not bad eh, very clear :) (hahaha, thank u thank u)
-> too many English words, some might not understand. (Yea, have to deliver in Cantonese and my Study was taken from an English writen book.. sigh~)
-> wah, relationship wor.. hmmm... ahhahaa :P



*****


And finally, today.. just now..

have to share my experience upon my enshrinement.. during Gohonzon Appreciation Night just now..

Ok lo, I thought I can handle cos its about myself right??

But, its not as easy as I thought..

I wrote a script earlier, its about half an A4 size, but during my speech just now, when I was trying to look at de paper to see back what have I wrote.. seriously.. I was blank in de moment and couldn't rmbr what I wanted to deliver then.. I couldn't see a single word from the paper at all..

was I that nervous????


sigh~~~~~~

In addition, my audience...ranges from adolescent to late adulthood.. wah lau weh~ I dunno whether they understand what I was trying to say or not lor.. haha.. And also I think got about more than 20 ppl.. and I only know about 20% of the people there.. others.. strangers~~ so scary!!!

Feedbacks :

-> good good.. very loud voice!
-> wah~ not bad wor just now.. got confident ya.. :)
-> erm, dont really understand certain part.. cos you dunno how to express some words, so de sentences become incomplete lor.. (yea, I was delivering it in Cantonese~~~yess.. Cantonese AGAIN... hmmm..)



*****


you see, everyday and night I gotto worry about all these.. wah.. really very tiring lor..

and tonite.. finally I will have a good night sleep.. lol..

NITEZZ~ :)